Getting Control of Myself
Screw it.
That’s how I started the post to my tribe of friends. I’d lamented a few times before how tired I was of the way that I looked and felt. A year and some months after the birth of my last baby, and I’m at my highest weight and certainly my least healthy state.
My friends enveloped me in their love: “You’re gorgeous.” “Curves are beautiful.” “Be proud of who you are.”
And while I love them even more for saying these sweet things to me and lifting me up as they always do, I requested some tough love and a reality check. One of the tribe provided it in a phrase similar to this: “You probably should make yourself a priority.”
Boom.
This statement stuck with me. I kept hearing it as I made dinner and lunch and snacks for my family. While I folded laundry and cleaned dishes and changed diapers. In all of these moments of service to my family, I was doing very little for myself. That’s not even a strong enough phrase. I was doing virtually nothing for me. That back burner? I had staked a flag there and was spending all my time ruminating in frustration and bad feelings.
And whose fault is that? Well, it’s my fault.
I could expect my husband and my kids to care about me more. And they do. But I need to care about me, too.
In the past, I’ve written about control. How I tend to try to take control of situations that cannot possibly be manipulated. Situations that are in no way under my power. Control is my nemesis. I like to plan and know exactly what’s going to happen tomorrow, next week, next month. Math Man laughs at me for having the kids’ birthday parties planned a year in advance (he’s basically right). So when things feel out of my control, I don’t do well.
My health, though? That’s completely within my control. Instead of doing something about it, I was blaming everyone else.
My husband works out but doesn’t make sure I get time to work out.
I’m tired and have too much work. I can’t fit it in.
My back hurts.
I’ll just do it tomorrow.
Again, I wasn’t making myself a priority. I wasn’t taking care of me. And if I don’t take care of me, who will?
So, yes, I told my friends, “Screw it.” This needs to be done, and it needs to be done NOW.
Yesterday, I began. My food choices were smarter. I “wiggled” a little so that I got some exercise in. Today was even better. Again, I made pretty smart food choices, and I went for a longer, more intentional walk with Baby Diva in the jogging stroller.
Three years ago, I was part of the Mamavation Bootcamp. Through that bootcamp, I lost 19 pounds, multiple inches, and was probably the healthiest I’d been since somewhere around college. Ultimately, my decision to finally kick myself in to gear this time around stemmed from the knowledge that I’d done this before, and I can do it again.
It seems to work best when we speak our goals and aspirations. I’m taking the plunge and making them public, and I’ll be charting my progress weekly. You can follow here on the blog or on my Cluttered Genius Facebook page.
My goals:
- Lose at least 25 pounds (anything over that, and I’ll feel like Wonder Woman)
- Run a full 5k without stopping to walk
- Beat my best 5k time (34:00)
- Drop 2 pant sizes (3 would be amazing)
- Move daily by walking or running
- Do strength training or toning exercises daily
- Eat better. (If you know me, this is a loaded statement. I would let myself survive off of chocolate bars and cupcakes if it wouldn’t have any negative effects on me.) Basically, this means more veggies, fruits, and healthy stuff.
- Set aside time for me. This will mean not procrastinating, less time on Facebook, getting work done during work time.
Phew. That’s a lot. Think I can do it? I’d love to know that I have your support.
Come hang with me on Twitter and Instagram, too. I’ll be posting updates there as well. On Twitter, I’m @lydsrich. On Instagram, I’m @clutteredgenius.
Nodding along to all of this. It’s so difficult to make ourselves a priority, isn’t it? There’s so many other things going on. But yes – screw it. It’s time. You got this and I can’t wait to follow along on your journey!
Thank you, Kristin! You’re always such an awesome support.
So proud of you, my friend. First of all…your writing style just makes me smile. You are truly gifted at that. No doubt you can achieve these goals and it IS important for you to take time for you. I won’t say “I told you so” even though I did. Oops! Cheering you on and knowing you’ll accomplish what you set out to accomplish. Miss you mucho!
Haha. It’s ok. I need the kicks in the rear to remind me. 🙂 Thank you!
You can do this, Wonder Woman. I need to do the same.
Thank you so much, Greta. Join me.
I’ve always looked up to you because I’ve always believed in your strength and abilities. You got this and I’m here along for the journey!
Toni – This means so so much to me that you say this. I really appreciate your support!
Yes girl! Me too! I wish we lived closer! I’m planning on running in September as well. 10 weeks! We can do this!
Heck yeah…I’ll see you at the start AND the finish line 🙂
I need this motivation too. I’ve gained weight after my miscarriage and that makes me sad and mad at the same time. I’m trying to give myself time, while also holding myself accountable. It’s a fine line.
And then I second guess my mad and sad at the same time…we are so funny to ourselves. Love to you.
You can do this! And I need to do the same. Thank you for posting the inspiration!
Awesome, Karen. I’d love to hear how it goes!
Wow….. AWESOME words!!!!! How profound that I should read this TODAY. As I was having my quiet time today, after my pity party, THE QUESTION was asked where is your identity, whose identity do you have. My thoughts I’ve lost mine…… I am momma, wife, teacher. Where oh Where has Cindy gone? So, I am on the search to find that beautiful lady . If she stops by send her home please!!:) Will be praying for you , my friend. I know you can do it! keep us posted on your success!
I love that you found this and that it hit at just the right time. 🙂 He’s awesome like that, isn’t He?
This post is everything , I needed to see this. Wonder Woman has nothing on you.
Nor you. I know you can do this, too!
Support is here! I really like how wholistic your goals are and that this is about more than dropping pounds.
Thank you! I’m trying to be more about the process rather than the numbers! 🙂
I. Love. This. You will kick butt, girl. Sending support and encouragement your way!
*side note: I would survive off of chocolate bars and cupcakes too if I could 🙂
Thank you! I have struggled this week (the first “official” week of trying to get myself together), but I refuse to let it get me down!
Linda,
This is so true for all of us, you said it perfectly. A great reminder for all women who do so much for everyone else not to forget about themselves. Thanks for the great post.
Melissa