Epiphany: I am a Mom
Miss Sassy Pants turned 9 in January, but just yesterday it really dawned on me: I am a MOM.
You’d think after giving birth to three babies, this wouldn’t have been such a grand realization. You’d think that after all the diapers I’ve changed or baths I’ve given or barfs I’ve cleaned up that I wouldn’t have been surprised to figure this out.
Somewhere in the midst of all the busy and crazy that is mom-ing, it hadn’t really dawned on me. Couple that with the fact that I still feel like it’s the 90s and I’m starting college (yeah, I’m stuck way back when), and that moment of epiphany was a real eye-opener.
So what was the moment? I had to sign a progress report. Yes, a progress report. I’m not sure why, but in the moment that I sat here at my desk and looked at her grades, it dawned on me that I am fully responsible for the lives of three little people. I may feel like the cool aunt, but I’m totally and completely these kids’ mom.
At some point, I shifted from being this young girl just starting her teaching career to a mom of three who stays at home in a messy house to be with my babies. While I’m still trying to be as professional as I can in this world, my children come first. It only took me three years of being here in all my yoga-pant-bad-hair-no-shoes glory to have it sink in.
When did it truly dawn on you that you were a parent?
Me…I don’t wanna grow up. Been eating cookie dough all day with kids. Even got the twins mixed up. Being a parent comes to the forefront when I feel the momma bear claws come out to protect my cubs! I become super parent when evil lurks into our lives. A truly emotionally day is always the day they r baptized. Its real I am accountable for their faith journey. The real reason we live. Our purpose. Sniff sniff.. now that deep.
When my first baby was sick all night and there was no one to help the next day. It came through loud and clear that no matter how tired or sick or busy I was, that baby had to come first….and I was the MOM. Reality time.
I was actually thinking about this today. I suppose I have had multiple moments of clarity where I realize, “I’m really a MOM!” Then, there are others where I’m just so busy that it goes by in a blur!
Eat that cookie dough. I don’t want to grow up either. Miss SP and I were jamming out to music in the car the other day, and it sort of felt like I was hanging with a friend. But I am just like you — mess with my babies, and I will CUT YOU. 🙂